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The scatter matter

| March 15, 2007 11:00 PM

By G. George Ostrom

Last week we learned that scattering Aunt Mimi’s ashes around in the Federal Forest Service trees and bushes was illegal. Too late for that column I received copies of letters written by the 1996 “Head Smokey Bear”, Jack Ward Thomas, telling one private Colorado citizen, Randy Roberts, he couldn’t toss out cremated human remains.

The first letter dated June 12, 1996 is in answer to Randy’s request to run a commercial scattering business, “…we do not agree that officially sanctioning your proposal would not further encumber National Forest System lands. Your clients, with or without your knowledge, may feel that they have an implied right to place markers, headstones, or other devices to commemorate the loss of a loved one. In addition, they may feel that they have grounds to stop future management activities if they felt the activity desecrated an area where a loved one’s remains had been spread.”

Ah hah! There we have the answer to the ban on “scattering Aunt Mimi.” It is all clear now. The Forest Service has become so paranoid over lawsuits against their old-time activities of logging and road building, they are afraid sentimental fern-feelers will file suits against timber sales. The bereaved’s lawyer would claim “…cutting of trees anywhere near ‘Stump Lake’ will disturb the peace and quiet of the final and sacred resting place of Aunt Mimi.”

Following the June rejection of his commercial scattering business request, Randy Roberts went to the top, appealed to the Secretary of Agriculture, Dan Glickman. Glickman asked the Forest Service to answer the appeal letter. He likely told lower bureaucrats, “Get rid of this nut, I’ve got more important things to handle.”

Thus we have the second letter from J. K. Meyers, signed “for Jack Ward Thomas.” This would indicate that Thomas also told someone below him to “get rid of this nut.”

The letter of August 5, 1996 includes the following information: “We have again considered your request and evaluated your well-stated reasons to support this activity on National Forest System land. We find no reason to change our previously stated position on this issue. Accordingly the Forest Service will not officially sanction, through the issuance of an authorization, the spreading of cremated remains on the national forests. Contrary to your understanding, this position applies to private as well as commercial activities of this nature.

“We hope this letter clarifies the agency’s position on this issue. We wish you success in promoting your business using alternative lands.”

So there you have the crux of the incident that made tens of thousands of Aunt Mimi scatterings illegal, but wait… there is governmental ambiguity here. The Inter Lake story that started me on this subject a couple of weeks ago quotes the “Ladies in White” being told they could scatter ashes on Bureau of Land Management acreage. The BLM is under the Department of the Interior, not Agriculture, so it would appear some Feds think it is OK to scatter Aunt Mimi on the public lands while other Feds do not.

I would like all management persons in Glacier National Park to relax. George Ostrom is not going to ever ask any of you for an official “scattering opinion,” not going to mention any past scatterings, or even bring this subject up with anyone working for the Park.

If the U.S. Forest Service ever figures out where I scattered Aunt Mimi in places where I parachuted, like the Lochsa, Bitterroot, Salmon, Selway, St. Joe, Lewis and Clark, Lolo or Flathead Forests, and makes me pick up her ashes … I’m not going to tell anyone where we do the rescattering.