Assisted living residents focus on gratitude this holiday season

Kay Walsh, 96, was all dolled up Monday afternoon with bright red lipstick and a jacket to match, accented with pearl jewelry and capped off with freshly done hair. She was dressed to the nines, but Walsh wasn’t going anywhere. Instead, she looked out the window at Lake View Care Center as three deer picked their footing through the snow. She’d seen the landscape turn from green to white from inside the facility throughout the COVID-19 pandemic, which ushered in a new way of life for Walsh and the center’s other residents. As a member of the group deemed most vulnerable to the virus -- seniors in assisted living homes -- she had been largely confined to her facility for the past eight months to reduce her risk of catching COVID-19.

Visitors at both Bigfork-based centers including Lake View and Rising Mountains Assisted Living, have been prevented from entering, so family time is conducted through glass windows or over the phone. There is no hugging, no lunches out or trips to church.

Walsh misses being with family -- and most especially, Thursday afternoon outings with her daughter for lunch and a movie and attending church every Sunday.

“I love her very much and I miss her,” Walsh said through the glass at Lake View.

With the holiday season approaching, both facilities are ramping up their efforts to make this Thanksgiving and the days to come, special one for those in their care.

Karyn Jones, activities director at Lake View said her staff have taken on duties that go beyond their job descriptions to make life easier for the residents.

“There is no such thing as a job description when you're in a pandemic. You jump in when you’re needed and where you’re needed,” Jones said.

One of her employees walks the halls playing guitar or keyboard to lift everyone’s spirits, while others buy sweet treats for the residents out of their own pockets.

“We don’t have outings so different residents will say, I wish I had a Dairy Queen Blizzard or french fries or whatever,” Jones explained. “We have a lot of staff members who go out of their own pocket and buy these special treats for our residents.”

One of the biggest challenges, in addition to keeping residents separated from their families, is not being able to show their affection through facial expression. With masks and face shields on, it can be difficult to convey emotion, Jones noted.

“We tell them everyday that we love them and how important they are to us, but it’s hard because you're not supposed to hug or touch and that is such a huge part of life,” she said.

But the precautions have been worthwhile -- Jones was happy to report that as of Monday, none of the residents in her care have tested positive for the virus. Staff members however, have contracted COVID-19, which means the facility goes into isolation and things like activities and communal dining are temporarily called off. But Jones said they recently finished a period of isolation so traditional dining will be in effect just in time for Thanksgiving. Residents are limited to two people per table, but it’s at least time to socialize and spend time out of their rooms.

Over at Rising Mountains Assisted Living, preparations for Thanksgiving are already underway. Dining room tables were topped with festival fall centerpieces with maroon and orange accents and candles for a homey, elegant atmosphere. And while resident families won’t be able to share in the Turkey Day festivities, they have been encouraged to drop off their loved one’s favorite holiday dish like cranberry sauce or pecan pie so the resident can enjoy the flavors of home.

“We’ve already had a few people bring Christmas flowers or centerpieces, just something to lift our spirits,” said Suzette Herreid, executive director of RIsing Mountains Assisted Living. Community members have also left cards and letters for the residents and several groups have stopped by to sing outside their windows.

Inside the facility, Herreid is working to deliver joy on a daily basis.

“We’re not isolating them in their rooms as much as we were. They're having dinner, we’re doing bingo ...but we’re doing those things at a distance,” she explained. Residents can walk the hallways with masks on and enjoy happy hour and other activities. Once each week a small busload goes for a drive for a little change of scenery. They might venture to look at fall leaves, around the lake, or through a neighborhood where one of the residents used to live. For the Christmas holiday, Herreid is planning a special Christmas light bus tour.

“We have to get back to some kind of normalcy,” Herredi said. “We know that the pandemic is out there, we know that COVID is real, but at the same time we still need to make sure that our residents' mental status and wellbeing is good.”

Rising Mountains Resident Marilyn Murer, 83, said the hardest part of pandemic life is the lack of contact, whether between family members or other people in the facility.

“We can be six feet apart with our masks on and then when we sit down we have to have two at a table … and that's about as much contact we can have,” she said.

It’s a far cry from pre-COVID days when four or five residents would visit over crafts or cards for as long as they pleased.

Her husband and fellow resident, Loyal “Pinky” Murer, 86, said he misses seeing his family and going on outings.

“The last time I would have what I would call a freedom day to be out was the 13th day of March and I went to Bigfork and got a haircut,” he recalled. “My family can't come in and see me … and I can’t get out. That’s kind of a bummer. To talk to somebody through the screen, it just isnt the same.”

But family members do try like when his grandson stopped by Rising Mountains to show the Murer’s the elk he’d just shot. And Murer’s daughter and husband came over from Washington for a visit.

“She and her husband had to stand in the pouring rain,” Marilyn Murer recalled. “You try to limit your conversation to more important things.”

Despite all the challenges that 2020 has brought, the Murers said they still have a great deal to be thankful for.

“I’m very healthy considering my age so I'm thankful for that and I’m thankful for this place because they just treat us so great,” Loyal said. “There are very nice people that run it and the food is perfect.”

Herreid has gratitude for both her staff and the local community.

“When we were down and couldn't find hand sanitizer, or couldn't get enough Clorox wipes we had family members bringing them in and dropping them off,” she said. “I think we have a special community here in Bigfork.”

Jones over at Lake View said she is most thankful for the small, family-oriented nature of her facility and for the family members who made an effort to visit their loved ones.

Sandy Mitts, wife of resident John Mitts, 81, walks over each day for a window visit with her husband and often brings their dog along for the experience. John said he misses going on outings, walks with his wife and holding their beloved pup, but is thankful to be healthy.

“I’m thankful that I’m as well as I can be and I have the Lord in my heart,” Mitts said.